An old schoolboy joke goes…
“Which hand to you use to wipe your arse?”
“Er – the right.”
“Ooh, you dirty @$#€% – I use toilet paper!”
I refer to this execrable joke as it is relevant to a tip I offer to you, my reader, which could save you having to actually USE your hand.
How many times has this happened to you? You have just finished a number two and you reach for the paper, only to discover the holder contains nothing more than an empty cardboard tube. TRAGEDY!
But perhaps not so. You see, almost all of those “cardboard” tubes are NOT cardboard at all. Rather, layers of thin, brown paper – stuck together. And with a little patience and sharp fingernails, you can prise the layers apart.
It may not be as effective as nice, soft tissue – but it still beats the alternative!
Here’s another. You’re going on holiday, taking with you a nice, new ghetto-blaster, camera, camcorder or similar piece of equipment – and you don’t want it to get STOLEN.
Before leaving, you purchase a reel of plastic insulating tape in a bright, contrasting colour. Then you wrap a strip right around your piece of equipment, in a position that will not interfere with its operation.
This will put any potential thief off, as it’ll look like the item is FALLING APART.
When you return home, you remove the tape.
Which brings us to tip three. Removing sticky tape residue from plastic!
If you’ve ever tried doing this with petrol, or some solvent, you already know what happens. It’ll likely DISSOLVE the plastic – or at least take the shine off it.
So how DO you remove sticky-tape residue? With more sticky-tape, that’s how!
Just pull off a piece, wrap it round your finger, sticky-side outermost and dab at the affected area. The residue clings to the sticky on the tape.
This also works with those annoying LABELS the manufacturers use on plastic goods, where the sticky always prefers to adhere to the object, rather than the label itself.
And finally… When you order a soft-drink from a fast-food joint, specify “no ice”. The thing is, the ice displaces about 60% of the space in the glass, or cup. And the dispensers ALREADY chill the drink. Thus the ice means you get less than HALF a glass/cup of drink – which then gets WATERED-DOWN as the ice melts.
Of course, whether you get TWICE as much drink for your money or not, depends on whether the sales-person will “top-up” your glass/cup. In my experience, most do.
But then, I live in Thailand – where service comes with a smile.
These four tips are my own invention, but you can use them for FREE! If I remember any more, I’ll post ’em on this site…